Wizardry: Hip Hop Style
by MistressCoCoLoVeR
Summary: enter an AU where magic is real, being is crazy is requirment to run a political office,and Harry Potter is well adjusted young wizard.Oh, and Huey and Riley Freemen are halfbrothers to a pure blood wizard. And their mom is still alive.
1. Intro

AN: Hello, and welcome to another of my boondocks fanfics. This one will be more about fun and adventure than romance and couples. Even though their will be pairings. This story will be completely AU and will follow no canon from either series. I hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but this IDEA…..

Warning: Fluff, cross-dressers, shounen-ai, shojo-ai, drugs, poking fun at pop-culture, violence, PWP, OOCness, plain stupidity, and language.

Wizardry: Hip Hop Style

INTRO to a WORLD with NO rules……

People always wondered if there are such as GOD, love, aliens, the female orgasm, and alternate universes. Well, one of these big foot myths are true. No, not aliens. Not the ones you're thinking of anyway. I mean there is such things as alternate universes.

YEP..

Universes where Al Gore won the election, weed is legal, prostitutes and pimps have a union, and Trix the Rabbit finally got his damn cereal. Oh, and where magic totally exists but is still kept secret from the general public.

What kind of universe are we visiting you're wondering. Well, we're visiting Universe 2198. In this universe Ralph Nader is president. Tom M. Riddle is Prime Minister. Albus Dumbledore is dried out, acid dropping, base-head who still runs Hogwarts. There is no such thing as the Dark Lord and Death Eaters. And Boy-Who-Lived. Harry Potter is a normal and well adjusted boy. Well, as well adjusted with having a cross-dressing Severus Snape as one of your God-father can be. The general public doesn't know about magic. Blaise Zabini is still black.. And male.. Still don't know who his daddy is though. And it just so happens that Huey and Riley Freemen are his half-brothers his mother never bothered to mention from one of the seven husbands she widowed.

Huey Freemen, Jasmine Dubois, Cindy Macpherson, and Michael Caesar have just turned eleven years old and their magical rites are coming into power.

This should be fun…..

TBC…

AN: This is just a taste. The full chapter is going up in a week or two. Until then R&R about this concept so far. I would love your constructive criticism.


	2. Perlounge

AN: This fic is only here to get rid of my writers block and something fun to write. I might not update often but I promise to make the chapters long and flow easily. This crossover will be slightly canon in the Potter universe and the boondocks characters will be more from the comic strip than the cartoon series. But the fic will still be AU. I hope you enjoy this story. Oh, and this is going to be a crack fic. Not to be taken seriously. ON WITH THE FIC!

Wizardry Hip-Hop Style

A Harry Potter and The Boondocks Crossover…..

Prelounge: The Admission Letter

"This is regular ol' bullshit. This is either a scam from a cult who are recruiting people in the boonies who are idiotic enough to fall for this mess or some nut job out there actually thinks he is Headmaster for a school of witches and wizards. Either way, someone has way too much time on their hands or crazy. Maybe both. I'ma throw this letter and be done with it. If you guys are smart then you will throw yours away too," gaffed one Huey Freemen to his friends.

They were all sitting in a circle as they were staring at the letters they each got from Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The letter talked about the school's mission of excellence, school curriculum, and helpful information about wizarding world they were about to enter.

"I think it's real! And if it's real then it will be an fairy-tale chance of a lifetime that will take us on an out of this world adventure," Jazmine squeaked with glee and wonderment.

"I think it's real too, Huey. No can put this much detail in a scam or delusion," Caesar chimed in.

"Yeah, don't be a downer and a cynic all the time Huey. This can be the real thing, yo!" Cindy exclaimed.

" I don't know…."

"C'mon!"

"Let's check it out Huey!"

"It will be fun and if it's a hoax then you crow and say 'I was right' all you want."

"All right already! I'll go along with this buffoonery for now," caved the irate revolutionist.

So Huey and co. huddled together with their admissions letters trying to figure out how they could convince their parents to take them to the U.K. when a loud pop sounded behind them and a hook-nosed, limp-hair, black bat like figure appeared behind them.

**HOGWARTS: HEADMASTER'S PRIVATE OFFICE**

"Atchooo!"

"Use a tissue for Merlin's sake."

"Someone must be taking about me again if I'm sneezing this much."

"That they are Albus. Anyway, You sent Professor Snape to pick up the new students in America? Are trying to traumatize them for life Albus?" Prime Minister Tom Riddle intoned with a raised eyebrow.

"Not really…, and I think Severus is an excellent choice to pick up the children. And Hagrid is with him to make sure he plays nice.," Albus Dumbledore smirked.

"The day Severus "plays nice" is the day my wife lets me get some blow and hire some hookers and I get to snort the coke off the hooker's arse," Tom snorted.

"Oh really, Tom. Severus is not that bad anymore. He hasn't tried to torture and scar his students by hitting on them and walking around in women's lingerie in two years now. I think," Dumbledore twinkled.

"I'm just saying; the lawsuits, favors, and the bribes I had to pull out my bum to keep you two out of trouble was a bloody nightmare. What in Merlin's boots were you thinking when you proposed a threesome between you, Albeforth , and his goat?" the befuddled Prime Minister inquired. "You know he wouldn't share his goat for all the tea in England, and that's a lot of bloody tea."

"I was high."

"High from what? Those funky lemon drops you keep uncovered in that candy dish."

"No, I was sniffing lemon scented markers that smell like lemon drops," Dumbledore state matter of factly.

"Dear Gods, save me from this fresh hell I'm in," Tom slumped.

**Back at the Freemen Residence:**

"Who the fuck are you?!?! Do you work for the government? Do you abduct little children?" Huey fired at the strange looking man who looked like a bat as got into a fighting stance in case the man did work for "The Man."

"No, I don't work for your crap government and I'm not a child molester you twat!" the mystery man growled indigently. "I'm Professor Severus Snape; Potions Master at Hogwarts and I was sent here to make sure you brats make it to school on time."

Huey eyed the strangely dressed man wearily. The man wore a cloak that covered most of his body; which was open in the front. The tee-shirt had David Bowie on it when he was still going calling himself a bi-sexual alien named Iggie Stardust. A pair of steel-toed, scuffed, and well-worn in Doc Martians peeked out from faded, tight, and ripped dark blue jeans. The older man's oily hair was into a tight pony tail with small wisps and tendrils framing his sharp featured face. A holster was strapped to his right forearm. In his hand he held a long stick that looked like the final polish was fading away.

"Likely story. I'll believe it when I see it," Huey countered.

"If I most," Severus did a routine of arm waving and flicking with his 'magic stick.' The Professor whispered something under his breathe and the furniture in his room started to float and spin.

"Ok! Ok I believe you! Put my things back down!" Huey screeched. As his stuff floated back to the floor the said teen breathed a sign of relief. He went up to his computer and hugged it with al his might while muttering "My baby is ok. It's alright. The bad man didn't hurt you. Papa is here."

"Ahem. If you are done groping the imamate object I would like to speak to you and your friend's guardians and/or parents?" Severus stifled a yawn and a under currant of barely veiled annoyance was in his voice. The wizard was tapping his foot and muttering about "annoying muggleborns."

"Alight, I'll phone my moms." Caesar flipped open his Razor™ phone and hit speed dial for his home.

"I'll holla at my folk," the white 'black-girl' chirped as she wiped out her sliver Razorä .

"Ohhhhh! I can't wait until mommy and daddy hear this!" the mulatto girl bounced from heel to heel with her tiny phone.

"I'll call down to my granddad," huey muttered. The young male strolled over to the door and open it half way. "Granddad!! Some Greasy Over-Grown bat wants to talks about Me and my friends attending this school in England."

**Potter Residence: Gordic Hallow**

"Lily! Oi, where is my thing of ah bob?" Auaor James Potter shouted down to his wife as he slide down the banister while securing the clasp of his robes. The 'man' of the house was running late for work and he couldn't his gun. Lily and his were later going to shop for school supplies with Remus, his wife Yvonne, Sirius, and Draco Malfoy.

"Did you check in the broom closest dad? It's like a bloody black hole and has sucked in mum's vacs and her 'secret' stash of naughty toys," bellowed their 14 yr. old son from the living room. The said was currently flopped in front of a 52' LSD flatscreen TV playing _Assassin's Creed_ . The Potter son was replica of the older Potter with a lanky-lean build, constantly tussled brunette hair, and killer Quidditch reflexes. The only difference was their eye color; Harry had emerald green like the mother while James has warm hazel brown eyes.

"Hey! Watch it young man! Or I'll give that game system to Ron Weasley's father," Lily threaten as she came from the kitchen in the hallway with James' weapon.

James walked up to his wife and kissed her on the cheek as he took his gun and put it in his holster next to his wand.

You maybe asking yourself 'why is a wizard carry a gun and why is technology working in the wizarding world?' Well… Twenty-five years ago when Tom Riddle was still prancing as Lord Voldermort and got therapy. Wizards was were still ignorant of technology and it advantages. But once extremist wizarding groups started using muggle weapons and tech. the rest was history. So here we are today in the wizarding world. A moving portrait on one wall and AK-47 mounted on the other.

"Sirius and Severus are coming over after Severus is done talking with parents of the children in America. Remus and Yvonne will be along later with their daughter Naomi," Lily informed her husband as ran towards the door.

"It will be good to see Remus and Sirius but do Yvonne and Severus have to come?," James whined.

"Oh be quite James! Remus loves Yvonne. And Sirius loves Severus. Get over it! Harry adores Severus and Yvonne both and they are my best friends. You don't like them because they don't worship the ground you walk on," Lily bobbed James in the head.

"True but I don't have to like it," James comprised as robbed the sore spot on his head.

"Just be nice and Yvonne might go easy on you tonight love. Bye love," the red head kissed her husband good-bye.

"I will" James apperatred off to work. Lily went back into the house to get her lazy arse son off his bum get a move on so can get ready for Diagon Alley. Remus, Yvonne, Naomi, Sirius and Draco would be there any minute.

Things had gone great for the most part Marauders over the years. After pussy footing for the most part James finally got the nerve to ask Lily in 6th year. Same year Sirius and Severus started dating; back then Sirius finally realized that he was much a queen as Elton John. But more manly of course. Severus and Sirius started dating when they were forced to spend two months detentions together for their dueling in halls. At first they couldn't stand each other but they started to find things in common. Then they became friends. Then lovers. Remus didn't lucky until met Yvonne Walkins when she started teaching Muggle Studies and Remus was in his 7th. Yvonne was hot chocolate brown skinned African American muggle college student who was studying abroad when she ran across an ad in the papers advertising a teaching position open. No experience required. And here she ended up. Plunky and idealistic who loved trying new things. Remus and Yvonne's romance was wild ride and full of hardships that they still face this day. But that's a story for another chapter.

**Freemen Residence: Living Room**

"I don't bloody believe it! I was told her two youngest were dead. This can't be happening. Shana Zabini has a lot of explaining to do," Severus babbled on to himself as he kept pacing the carpet in front Granddad, Riley, and Huey. The others were still waiting for their parents.

"What are you talking about young man?" Granddad asked. Clearly confused.

"Sir, I never forget a face and I know yours. I was are at your son and Shana's wedding. And I was at their 'funeral.' Hers was faked. Shana is still alive! I don't know why she lied about her two youngest dieing but I intend to find out," the Potions Professor exclaimed.

"What! That's impossible! My parents died in a drive-by shooting. I saw their bodies. She can be alive," Huey raged.

"Yeah, nigga! You a lyin', hook-nosed, bastard! Get out be fo' I pop a cap in dat ass nigga!" Riley growled.

"Your mother is alive and well you and I proof it. You mum is a very wealthy woman how do you think you were able to afford this house and they way you live now? Your mum was telling she was secretly looking after a family in America and taking care of their finical expenses. That to me didn't since because Shana is quite self-centered and only doesn't things for other if she gets something in return. But one thing about her is that she would do any thing for her kids. Your older half-brother Blaise Zabini is spoiled rotten. I think his memory of you two was wiped clean to keep you two safe. I actually know where she is right now," Severus stated.

"Nigga! That ain't proof. Yo jus' bump yo' funky ass gums. Show us some real proof or I start shootin'!" Riley barked as he cocked his MK and aimed at Severus.

"While I don't approve of Riley shooting people I would like some real proof also. Like a phone number. Mailing address," Huey offered as he tried to keep his emotions in check. The fact that his mother might be alive had him excited and angry. Excited because he would be able to with his mother again. Angry because his mother might have abandoned him and Riley for some unforgivable reason.

"Ok, I got the address and phone of the hotel she is currently staying at in Tokyo," Severus pulled out a slim black book.

**Florence, Italy: **

**A Summer Villa in a heavily warded wizard village.**

"WHAT THE FUCK!?!?! This can't be possible. This can't be happening. How could mum do to me? My pure blood family lineage is ruined! I have half-breed mutts in my domain now. How could mum sink so low as to sleep with a filthy muggle and BREED with it. I'm going to get shite faced of my arse and hope this is a horrible nightmare," Blaise Zabini growled. He balled the letter that had just been delivered by owl in his fist and through it in the trash.

The letter read:

_Dear Blaise,_

_How are you my darling? I'm going fine. I'm have a wonderful here in Tokyo, Japan. I'll be sending your gifts soon. Anyways, my business will be longer than expected and I might have to sleep with this sweaty Gundam otaku who is the cousin who to the guy who I need to get the contract from. No big deal. I've been porked by worse so I will fine. Oh, son…. I've been meaning to tell you. You are not my only son. You have two younger named Huey and Riley Freemen who live in Woodcrest, Ill. Huey should be turning eleven now and old to go Hogwarts. There father was a amazing and loving muggle named Phillip Freemen. Out of all the husbands I had Phillip was one I love the most. Your father, Blaise….. Well, lets just say we didn't hate each other. Much. I'll be in time to you and your brother off to school. Take care. Don't drink up all my good stash. Love you. _

_Bye_

_TBC……._

_AN_: Yes! I'm finally done for now. This chapter is all about setting up the mood and what world in this AU is like. Yup, Huey and Riley's brother is a wizard blood purist. Expect Huey and Blaise to butt heads about that later. I kind of rushed it but I hope you like this chapter. God bless you all and have a Happy Thanksgiving. See ya.

Next Chapter: Severus contacts Shana and talks to the American parents. The kids then board the train for Hogwarts. We meet Remus, Yvonne, Naomi Lupin.


End file.
